My Baby is One!

It has been a pretty eventful last few days.  My baby girl turned one and we had her 2, yes 2 birthday parties.  Can we all say spoiled :)  We had her a day care party and then we had her a party for everyone that has been along on the journey from the beginning to she how much she has grown up.

Along with Ms. Lizzy turning one comes a lot of new territory I am about to be introduced to.  She has already inducted me into the hall of major fit throwing where she is determined to have her way and crawl away while I am changing her.  She has also decided lately that she wants to spend longer than 10 minutes in the bath even when the water is getting cold. 

She is moving up at the day care to the toddler class and I am sure the kids in her class are going to be kind enough to introduce her to all sorts of things such as biting, hitting and pinching.  I will just have to go with the flow and handle those things as they come along.

WOW, A Year has Almost passed

I cannot believe it has been a year since God has given me the greatest gift bestowed upon a woman.  I have been blessed the past year with Elizabeth in my life and the year has seemed to fly by.  I have shared so many moments and memories with her that I can't wait to share with her when she is older.  She recently started laughing at things and showing her father and I how much of a personality she is really going to have.  My favorite moments are when she wakes up in the morning and I get to see that cute smile on her face and she reaches for me.  I will have to admit I still baby her way more than I should, but I think to an extent all parent's do that even well beyond the years of being a baby and toddler.

In just 2 days I will be helping her blow out a candle and perhaps starting a birthday tradition she her father and I can share with her for years to come.

Where has the time gone...

One week from today Elizabeth is going to no longer be a baby, but entering the fun toddler zone.  While this is exciting for her it breaks my heart to know that my baby will no longer be a baby.  Have you seen that commercial where the dad is schooling his daughter on driving and hands her the keys and from his view shes still a little girl but when it snaps to current day she looks about 16? I guess that is how we will always see our kids. 

I am loving how active she is now and how much she is learning everyday.  I am looking forward to all that she will be doing now that she is extremely mobile, but I sure do wish time would slow down a little.  I think what really hit me is when I went to put a 12 month onesie on her the other day and it was a little tight on her. I am sure this is one of many stages I will go through as a mom and I will overcome all of them and look back at how much she has grown.

Walking and Birthday Excitement

Elizabeth is finally starting to walk! She walked across the living room this weekend and what made it even cuter is that she did it on her tip toes.  I am so proud of my baby girl.  I think she will officially be walking by her birthday. 

My husband and I finally sent out her invitations for her first birthday which was exciting and overwhelming all at the same time.  I knew it was going to be tough watching her grow up so quickly, but I had no idea just how hard it would be knowing my family is missing so much!  Telling them what Lizzy is doing and them seeing it is two different things.  I am so very thankful for Skype.

I also got some news today that my brother is going to get married soon and I am hoping that I don't miss out on this special event.  I am hoping we can fly home as a family, but if Lizzy and I can make it that would be great.

Ah Spring Break and Sleep...

A week into my spring break and I have gotten some much needed rest.  I am still letting baby girl sleep with me, but I am starting to let her sleep in her crib as well.  I know it is going to be a process, but I'm getting there. 

Back to work next week and I am determined to start a work-out program next week as well.  I am going to try to share my journey to weight loss as it happens. 

Feeling Better and BREAK...

I am happy to report that Lizzy is feeling much much better, but since she got sick last week she has been super clingy and fussy whenever I leave her sight. I was getting use to the idea of my baby girl being a little independent and doing her own thing, but now I have to teach her how to do that again. 

Spring break starts for me today which mean extra time with Lizzy.  I am excited about having a little time off even though I have only been back to work for a little over a month. I am sure I will report back early to plan lessons and organize my classroom. 

A Sick Baby ='s a Guilty Feeling and Regret sometimes

Monday night was spent at the ER with my baby girl.  The outcome of our visit was that Elizabeth has Pneumonia.  At first all I could do was cry because I immediately felt like it was my fault since I have her in daycare.  The doctor made sure to tell me that it's because she is in daycare and not to feel bad because it's common for baby's to have this their first few years of life and did that make me feel any better, of course not!

I was angry with the parents at first because of course one of them dropped their kid off sick and made my baby girl sick, but what I read online quickly changed my mind about that.  I read that pneumonia actually isn't contagious and that it usually develops from a cold which my baby keeps from being at daycare.

After spending the day with Elizabeth yesterday I knew that her being in daycare is very beneficial, but it still does not take away my guilt and regret that I'm not a stay at home mom and able to spend more time with Elizabeth. 

My husband, being the stand up guy he is, went to McDonald's this morning to get me coffee because he knew how I was feeling about having to take Elizabeth to daycare and the that I hardly slept last night out of the fear of something happening to Lizzy while she slept.  He also was unable to take today off and I am sure he feels a little regret about that as well. 

I have 2 weeks of work off coming up soon and I am definitely going to spend that time with Elizabeth and showing her all the love and attention I can!

Just one Of Those Days

Well it was a pretty eventful weekend here in Okinawa.  We didn't experience the earthquake thankfully, but we were under tsunami watch most of the weekend.  I must admit it was pretty scary, but my only thoughts were of the people suffering on mainland and of keeping Lizzy protected.  It's amazing that once you have a child you no longer think about yourself first. 

My husband and I were talking a few hours after the warning was issued and he told my truthfully that when he first heard the warning his only thought was to rush home to make sure he was there to take care of Lizzy and he ask if that hurt me and I told him with the biggest smile absolutely not, I feel the same way! I even broke it down for him and told him that if we are ever in a situation and he knows that without a doubt he could only take care of Lizzy I told him to take her run and don't even look back.  That's what being a parent is all about placing your child's needs before your own.  Don't get what I am saying wrong, by thinking does that mean never having a date night again or getting out and enjoying yourself no, it just means not getting that pair of 200 shoes you want because that 200 could easily go into your little one's account or toward necessities for them. 

This morning I was heart broken because I had to drop Lizzy off at daycare. It was one of those days that I just wanted to stay home and snuggle on the couch with her.  I could tell she wasn't feeling a hundred percent and she had a restless night, but sometimes we have to make sacrifices that we don't really want.  Once I dropped Lizzy off she seemed fine and was eager to play with her friends, but as a mother I still had that guilt in my heart knowing she wasn't a hundred percent.  So today I will keep my cell attached to my side and call every few hours just to make sure she is OK. 

Trying to run Before Walking and Guilt

I had the greatest moment with my baby girl a few days ago.  She is officially trying to start running, yeah I said running.  She gets so excited that she can actually hold on to things and walk now that when my husband or I come in the room she tries to get to us as quickly as possible and ends up falling.  So far so good, no boo boo's yet other than at the day care. 

I am still loving my new job, but I have those days where I feel so guilty about Lizzy being in day care and I really miss her during the day.  I love the fact that when I pick her up they tell me the new things that she is doing, but it also breaks my heart to know I missed that moment in her life.  I know I will see it, but I didn't get to see it first.  Although I know I am providing a quality of life for Lizzy that she might not have not attending day care it still gets to me some days.

It's going to be a mommy daughter day on Sunday because hubby has duty, one of the many jobs of the military that people don't know about.  I enjoy those moments, but I know my husband sure does miss Elizabeth when he is at work.

One of those days

It's just one of those days here in Okinawa.  Woke up to the sound of rain and of course couldn't find my umbrella.  It's ok though because I am determined to have a great day.  On another note I had a great weekend with Anthony and Lizzy.  She got a new toy and has already managed to find out how to work all the fun stuff on it.  We had to video tape her because she was laughing it up at me playing with her.  Hopefully I will be able to post pics of her in it soon along with the video. 

Hope everyone has a great week!

Work after 2 weeks

Wow, I do not think I have been this tired in months.  I am slowly trying to ween my baby from co-sleeping and I think it's a 50/50 deal because although I want to sleep soundly at night I also love the fact that I know she's there with me and she's ok.  I am one of those moms that is paranoid about SIDS and I am sure once she turns one I won't be as worried.

I have been back to work for 2 weeks now and loving it.  Although I started at the end of a school year and the kids are somewhat set in their ways the new school year for Japanese schools starts in April.  I am looking forward to a fresh start!

It was a struggle leaving Elizabeth when she was younger at daycare, but now I enjoy dropping her off and seeing the excitement as she sees her friends and tells me bye bye.

What I am most grateful for is that fact that hubby has been able to experience this all with me and has not deployed since Lizzy has been born.

Feel free to leave me any suggestions for weening my baby girl from co-sleeping, I would greatly appreciate it!

Back to Work After a break

I never imagined myself not working once I finished college, I mean isn't that why people go to college to have careers?  Even after my baby girl was born I knew I had to figure out a balance between having a career and being the best mom possible.  I grew up with both parents working and I think I turned out pretty darn good, so I definitely see no harm in both parents working. 

When Elizabeth was 7 weeks old I took that plunge and oh boy was it one of the hardest things I ever did, but I knew I wanted to return back to work.  Everything was going great I was working 4-8 hours a day depending on class sizes and being able to spend lots of quality time with Lizzy and then came Christmas break. 

Lizzy and I decided to go home and visit and when I returned I returned to a job that did not have funding, seriously you mean the government ran out of funding!  I was mad, but there wasn't much I could do so I decided to take advantage of my time off.  I would keep Lizzy home from daycare some days and spend time with her and on other days I would sub at the local middle school.  I applied for several jobs, but had only interviewed for a few.

I was beginning to give up hope and then the call came last week that a school off base had a middle school teacher opening and they wanted to know if I could start the following week.  I was estatic.  I tried not to sound to excited, but who was I kidding, I missed the classroom so I eagerly said yes and sent a confirmation email within the hour. 

I have only been out of work for a few months now, but now it's going to be about getting back into a routine and making sure I don't take away any quality time with Lizzy.  So here's to a new day, a new job and beginning another journey.